Sweat ... But Don't Sweat It!

"I don't care if you can't do it perfectly ... I just care if you try!"  Yes, that's what Tony said to me as I was doing Day 8 - Core Synergistics.  He said it just in time, too.

Since this is only my second week, I am still unable to do some of the moves.  Let me rephrase that ... I am unable to do some of the moves as PERFECTLY as I long to.  Halfway through the dvd, I find myself on the floor on all fours, looking up at the t.v. sceen and watching these perfectly muscled individuals RUNNING IN PLANK POSITION.  Next thing I know, they're scrambling across the floor, "walking" on their hands & feet - again in PLANK POSITION. Seriously, people?  What the heck, I'll give it a go ... and immediately felt the tension building in both my mind and my neck and hearing my traitorous brain whisper, "You can't do this." "Shut UP!" I silently scream back.  I'm preaching "no negativity" here ... how am I gonna get through these moves with this devil on my shoulder spouting all this negativity?  Where's my angel?  I need him NOW!

At that moment, I hear Tony telling me, "I don't care if you can't do it pefectly ... I just care if you TRY!"  Oh, okay ... I can DO that.  I'm in plank position, there's a whole lotta butt-rise, and here I go, scrabbling madly across the floor like some kind of big ol' bug, laughing like a maniac (I'm convinced that laughter is an absolutely WONDERFUL core exercise) ... 'cause I know that I look crazy with my booty high in the air, arms & legs flailing about.  Well, I think to myself, I must be doing SOMEthing right.  'Cause all of a sudden, I had to fling my glasses off ... couldn't see a thing outta my right eye.  Know why?  There were huge drops of sweat pooling inside the right lens.  When I took them off, I had to look down because my hand landed in something wet and slick on the floor ... my own sweat.  A lot of it.  Inside my head, I begin to relax.  I may not be doing it perfectly, but I'm doing it.  Something incredible is happening here.  Not only is my body changing, but my mind is changing, too.

Funny to me how Tony manages to say just what I need to hear, just when I need to hear it. This has happened time and time again over the past eight days.  There's no magic here.  There's only grunting, teeth-grinding, sweating effort.  I'm learning ... I'm learning that there's no need or point in me telling myself "you can't do this."  If I could do everything perfectly, I would be ready to move on to a harder, more challenging program, right?  I'm beginning to see that the difficulty of every moment of every move IS the point.  It's hard ... and it's working because it's hard.  And just getting through it, even when you have to modify, is a tremendous accomplishment.

While my body is working hard, I want my brain to relax into each moment and movement. Sweat, but don't sweat it - another good mantra for this whole process, I think.  I have flicked the devil of negativity off my shoulder.  He has been replaced by my angel of positivity. Thanks, Tony Horton :)

P90X/DAY9